By Emmett Watson

Published in The Seattle Times/Seattle Post-Intelligencer, March 4, 1990

The Seattle Times/Seattle Post-Intelligencer | Sunday, March 4, 1990

If you were skulking around the edges of this column recently, no doubt wishing you were somewhere else, we've laid some heavy stuff on you. All about corned-beef hash and clam chowder.

The hashers responded happily. The chowderheads, about half of them, were outraged. That's because I declared there is no civilized justification for using tomatoes in clam chowder.

Clams joined with tomatoes—a sinister alchemy, I said, and one that should be abolished forthwith.

Anyway, I promised you Sunday folks a true, honest, upright recipe for clam chowder. It is tomato-less. It is noble.

A bowl of this heavenly concoction comes with a guarantee. That is, I guarantee that a bowl of the stuff, created by your own hand, will make you a physically and morally better person.

To achieve this near-perfection, I enlisted the expertise of Craig Wollam, a young cook of outstanding ability. Wollam is the first assistant, right hand, so to speak, of Jeff Smith, the world famous Frugal Gourmet.

It so happens we are neighbors at the Pike Place Market. Instead of the Frugal Gourmet's kitchen, we used mine - a lint free laboratory with many delicate scientific instruments like pots, pans, steamers and spoons. Craig Wollam can handle these instruments like a brain surgeon.

What we were after can best be called "Tide-Flat Clam Chowder."

This is a chowder with salt air in it, a hint of seaweed, perhaps with a bit of sea water mixed in. The essence of Puget Sound is its trademark.

With Craig Wollam as chef, me as gofer, here is true clam chowder, one that will shame 90 per cent of the city's restaurants:

Acquire some clams, by thievery if necessary. About 4 pounds will do, the fresher the better. For one hour, soak the clams in fresh water. They will eject enough sand to repave the Alaskan Way Viaduct. Then drain.

Heat an 8-quart, heavy-bottomed pot. Add a half pound of salt pork. Not bacon, salt pork! Cut pork into about half-inch cubes. Cook until browned, but not crispy. Drain off two tablespoons of the salt-pork fat into a separate 6-quart pot. Set aside.

Into the larger pot with the browned salt pork, put one onion and two stalks of celery, each chopped. How fine? Use your own judgment. Sauté for 10 minutes. Then add two large potatoes, peeled and coarsely chopped. Throw some thyme in the pot and sauté 10 minutes more.

Now take the 6-quart pot with the pork fat in it, add two chopped cloves of garlic and sauté gently. Now you are on the brink of greatness. Don't be nervous.

Throw in the clams and about half a cup of wine, White wine, dammit! Don't be precious. Anything fit to drink will do.

Turn heat to high. Bring to a boil covered—simmer for seven to 10 minutes, until clams open. Those clams that don't open should be cast aside with the same contempt you should use on tomatoes in chowder.

Strain nectar and return to the pot. Remove meat from the clams, set aside on a covered plate. Now throw the clam shells into the pot. Now add some bottled clam juice to go with your own nectar. Use some black pepper here.

Cover and simmer for 30 minutes. Use a stopwatch.

Now strain your finished nectar into the pot with potatoes, celery and onion. Control yourself. You are creating ambrosia.

Add a little more wine. Cover and simmer until celery, potatoes and onions are done. The potatoes should be tender and rounded on the edges. This is your thickener; you will need no flour.

Now, at the very last, throw in your clams. Cook only long enough, one minute, maybe, to rewarm the clams. An overcooked clam, I must warn you, takes on the character of a cork-and-rubber center or the official American League baseball.

You are almost finished. Add some Tabasco sauce, perhaps, or some ground red pepper flakes. Garnish with parsley if you have nothing better to do.

Now, true "tide-flat chowder" is somewhat gray in color. If you insist, add a smidgeon of milk for whiteness—but remember, too much milk will violate the intense richness, the very integrity, of this chowder.

There. I hope we have conquered this business of decent clam chowder. The enemy was stubborn, but to paraphrase General MacArthur when he accepted the surrender aboard the battleship Missouri, "These proceedings are now closed."